Spend your Money Airlines

Cow Milk

Airline: Air France
Aircraft: Boeing 777-300ER
Flight Time: 13:55hours
Did I have fun?: Yes
Do I like milk? No i’m deadly allergic 😔.

Alright so today I decided to take a trip to France but didn’t wanna fly an American airline, no pun intended. Saw an ad online for Air France that said “Nonstop Service from Los Angeles to Paris only 699$!”. You know I was fooled because I ended up paying 6 grand for a seat. Oh yeah i accidentally payed for a first class seat too. So now I have 2 seats. I need to loose some weight. Well at least I have a seat for both sides! Anyways let’s get today started! Enjoy!!

Alright so we pulled up at LAX. Yes i said pulled up because why not we in LA. Anyways the bus driver wouldn’t shut up about this game called Infinite Flight he plays, like dude shut up i don’t wanna hear your life story. Anyways once he dropped me off he gave me the “i need a tip face” so i just told him, i payed 6k for this trip you probably used to have money but instead you pay for a subscription on a game. nerd smh. He looked like he wanted to cry i’m not gonna lie. Anyways I checked in to Air France, went through security and then as if i haven’t walked enough i had to walk to the bus to take me to my gate. I guess LAX has a new Terminal that’s just west of the Tom Bradley Terminal. The bus driver looked like she just farted or she wanted to quit. Could’ve been a combination of both. Once getting to my gate I sat down in a section where I WANTED TO BE ALONE but instead this kid came up asking for milk… kid i’m not a cow i get it i’m fat but i’m not that fat. Kid finally left after i told him i don’t have milk but i have candy. Got stared down for that.

So we started boarding while security was watching me like a hawk, and i get on the Aircraft and the flight attendant is like “do YoU kNoW wHErE yOuR sEaT iS?.” I have a ticket for a reason man… well tickets. I went to my economy seat first to see what it was like being a peasant, unfortunately the kid who thought i was a cow was in my seat. Instead of being a man i let him have it and gave him some candy since i don’t have milk. I head back to my seat and have this old guy sitting next to me, he said he was in World War 2, man i’m not gonna lie he looked like he was in the revolutionary war. holy moly. We pushed back on time, no delays for anything. We took off nice and smooth, smoother than the old man’s forehead.

Hey look it’s the Amusement Park that costs as much as house in Beverly Hills!

Heres lose your money city

Im leaving this blank 1. because i’m too lazy to type a whole essay and 2 because i have to go to bed soon lmao. I love making these though when i have time!

Well hey that was quick, 13 hours later were on the ground and ted (the old man) is still alive somehow. Very smooth landing as always!

*Looks like they wanted us to fall 30-50ft. Okay well Air France more like “Take your money and your LIFE”.

Thanks for viewing guys! Sorry this one is short and simple, it’s a weekday and is a bit harder to make these since i have school. I’m currently working on 5 more. i’ll list the airlines: United, Air New Zealand, Ryanair and Alaska! I will try to work on them asap but it’s not always guaranteed! Anyways thanks again for viewing and hope you enjoy this short one. 🤙🤙


Now I want to meet ted LMAO


He might be croaked.

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That’s if he is still alive

well i am going to the natural history museum so i’ll let you know if he’s on display.


Ooooh okay Roger that Captain

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I will publish these for you.

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explain more…

If you give me $699 and Ted, this is a book series.

Cow milk

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it could’ve been deer milk

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well like i told @United403 im going to the natural history museum and if i see him on display i’ll let you know 😏


Can’t wait for what you have to say about the best airline in the USA!

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😏 oh just wait

Please do more trip reports

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If was worth the read. Very funny!

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I’m cackling 💀

Or keep your cargo airline alive, if you’re FedEx’s founder and CEO Fred Smith

Sometimes it do be like that